There is no way to deny the fact that the most ancient feeling in the world is related to love. Even love has been the reason behind many debates and wars that happened thousands of years ago. Trojan war, for example, was actually the aftermath of unbounded love. In Greek mythology, the Trojan War was waged against Troy by the Greeks after Paris, one of the princes of Troy, took Helen secretly from her husband Menelaus, king of Sparta. The war was one of the most devastating ones in Greek times and has found its place in many literary works of Greek literature, most notably Homer’s Iliad. Well, love, for its irresistible influence upon human minds, has always been at the centre of attention of cross-sections of people.
The notion of love has transcended through centuries to the following generations and the forms of love have experienced profound changes both in ideologies and means as every generation has harboured new notions about love in their mindset.
I have come to know from the aged people of my acquaintance that there was a time when lovers used to share their feelings and transmit romantic messages through pigeons. One may refute it in this way that people got accustomed to such metaphysical communication as that age was not facilitated with modern amenities. But I think if those aged people are still asked to choose a sweet and romantic medium for exchanging heart feelings, they would probably yearn to go back to that old, but heart-soothing process instead of digital love of this twenty first century.
Years ago, the world was not so blessed with technologies and so, people used to meet their beloved very rarely and their eyes were means of commuting to each other. The young generation may find such love tedious, but it was not like that at all rather that love was true in the sense and their love was beyond any doubt regarding moral integrity.
In the later periods, lovers started communicating their feelings through letters. Penning epistle using romantic languages and dictions drawn from the core of the heart was really something appeasing though young generation may consider this outdated. Moreover, relations in that age have lasted longer wherein presently relations are very transient and commercial in a sense. Again, the lovers were more committed and devoted to each other than us, whereas youths, in this age, prefer frank and fanciful relationship.
With the advancement of technology and passage of time, we are now standing in the 21st century, when love has taken a U-turn in its styles and conventions. Young generation has transfigured love into such a form which is infused with hues that instigate abrupt excitement inside but without permanence. Love is also now defined in our society in several ways like time-pass love, cyber love, Facebook love, mobile love, etc. Couples nowadays sometimes simply make fuss and waste time in the name of emotional attachment.
Love is now very much related to money and pleasure rather than having a soul to soul appeal and such notion is pervading into people of all ages. That’s why we see that during the celebration of Valentine’s Day different business entities come up with unbelievable promotional offers. A section of people are capitalizing on such fake emotions and making easy money. For instance- last year Hotel Amari Dhaka offered a special package of Tk. 9 lakh for Valentine’s Day. Can you just believe it – Tk. 9 lakh for a mere package! Many couples even repented for not being able to attend that event. Such extravagance can never be a true indication of true love. Such offer points to the fact that love without money is now totally beyond imagination in this pesky world as girlfriends are white elephants. Roaming around here and there rain or shine, keeping girlfriend always jocund by gifting splendid and obviously precious gifts, feasting girlfriend’s companions with sumptuous food in the posh restaurants are part and parcels of a love affair wherein all of these activities are pompous and if someone is enthusiastic about such business, he must possess a healthy wallet. This is why Lord Dewar has said that love is an ocean of emotion surrounded entirely by expenses.
Moreover, sometimes their (couples of present times) feelings, hectic in nature, ascend to insanity which consequently leads them to that emotion that is mostly accompanied by sensuousness. Such specific kind of attitude has been put in plain words by science. Robin Dunbar, professor of evolutionary psychology, clarifies in this way— “When people are in love, the emotional bits of their brain are very active, lighting up. But other bits of the brain that are in charge of more sensible thinking are much less active than normal because love releases certain chemicals in our brains.’’ He further adds, “One of the chemicals is dopamine, which gives us a feeling of excitement. Another is called oxytocin and seems to be responsible for the light-headedness we feel when we are with the person we love.’’
Nevertheless, one may definitely let love enter into his heart but if it is bestowed liberally upon all in general in lieu of someone, it would obviously help shelling out the pitfalls of a man’s character and turning oneself into a benign person. There is in man’s nature, Francis Bacon states in his essay ‘Of Love’, a secret inclination and motion towards love of others, which, if be not spent upon someone or few, does naturally spread itself towards many, and makes men become humane and charitable.
However, there is nothing wrong in modern-day relationships. The problem lies in the approaches. There has always been love in this world and it will survive till the doomsday. But the only thing to remember is that our love should not be a display of our obnoxious mindset and hedonistic behavior rather it should reflect our true passion in a meaningful way.